Inappropriate Use of a Schnauzer

I was sitting on my female human’s lap the other night and looking through old photos on her computer. She started laughing when she came upon this photo:

12909536_10205958640224732_6762399562662258914_oYes that is me with “kleenex” stuffed into my collar.

Here is what happened: Last Spring, my female human’s allergies were acting up big time with the change in weather in Central Oregon (lots of Spring pollen) and so my female human asked my male human to hand her some “kleenex”.

He felt that since one of my hobbies is sitting close to and staring at my female human (it is one of the techniques I use to manage her), I should also be her tissue dispenser!

So my male human loaded my collar (or necklace as I prefer they call it) with “kleenex” so my female human could have easy access to tissues as I stare at her.

Highly inappropriate use of a Schnauzer! 


Mike’s First Family Vacation

My humans have a long history of vacationing with their miniature schnauzers (Mike and I are #4 and #5 in their line of adopted rescued miniature schnauzers – starting with some dog named “Kerie” in the 1990s…they have photos of her around the house). Before the humans adopted Mike (rescued mini schnauzer #5) they took me on a couple vacations.

However, Mike is sort of a handful – he has some anxiety issues and some leash aggression that they humans have worked with him for a couple years on – so we have not gone on any family vacations.

Well the humans felt Mike was ready to go on his first family vacation and we traveled to Portland, Oregon and the Oregon Coast (Cannon Beach) for a three-day vacation this past Thursday to Saturday.

Road Trip

Mike got a little panicked when the humans were packing up the car. My understanding is his previous humans (who surrendered him) used to take their other dog on trips and board Mike at a dog kennel place (where according to his vet records he would suffer intestinal distress and other issue).

Although the humans assured him he was going on the trip, he still jumped in the trunk as they were packing and would not get out. They had to fish him out and put him INSIDE the car where he would ride!


“I will ride in the trunk the whole trip, as long as I get to go” – Mike

The Hotel Room

It appeared that Mike was experiencing his first time in a hotel room (the humans booked a room at a “dog friendly” hotel). He was unsure of the room at first and got a little panicked when the male human went to the hotel room bathroom and closed the door. Mike behaved as if the male human had been sucked into another dimension through a wormhole and whimpered at the door.  He was so relieved when the male human reappeared.

Mike eventually settled in but kept looking around the room like: “We had a perfectly nice home, why have we moved to this tiny room?!?!” I guess a hotel room is a “kennel for humans”…


Mike and I about to enter the “kennel for humans” also known as a hotel room. (I am going to have to learn how to take photos as my female human has very questionable camera skills)

The Elevator

I do not like these things humans call “elevators”, they do not make sense to me. One moment you are in one area, then you get into this weird room that shakes and when the door opens you are somewhere else. Must be some strange human magic.

Mike REALLY did not like the elevator and would refuse to get on it a second time. The male human had to drag Mike onto the elevator. After a couple elevator battles, the humans, which had us staying on the 3rd floor, finally just took us up and down via the stairs.


My humans discovered years ago that if you carry your miniature schnauzer around on your back, you can go into most places while on vacation (except restaurants). So in Portland and Cannon Beach, Oregon, we went sightseeing with our humans on their backs in our doggie backpack carriers.

Mike loves being in his carrier and attached to the male human (I ride with the female human, it’s a “girl thing”) and never wants to get out of his carrier.

When in his backpack, Mike does not have aggression towards dogs on the ground. He does not like other humans sneaking up behind his human to pet him, and he will give a warning growl.


Mike, very happily attached to his assigned human

Passed Out on the Ride Home

Vacationing is exhausting and Mike and I passed out on the ride home. Overall Mike did fairly well on his first family vacation!


The Herd

I have survived the experience, now that it is over, but for 5 days (yes FIVE DAYS) I had to endured “THE HERD”.

Not sure what my humans were thinking but they agreed to “babysit” 2 other Schnauzers (another Miniature Schnauzer and a Standard Schnauzer) while their humans went on vacation. So Chopper (a male Miniature) and Frieda (a female Standard) moved into our house! Four Schnauzers in the house = a Herd of Schnauzers.

As you can see from the photos below, I was forced to become part of THE HERD. Unfortunately I fell prey to the “herd mentality” and followed the group around the house. It was if I could not control myself. My male human appeared to be the assigned “Shepherd” and “The Herd” followed at his heels around the house.

Having all those extra dogs in the house, and being an unwilling part of THE HERD, distracted me from my normal job of managing the humans. My humans were out of control – cuddling and loving on the visiting Schnauzers as if they were their own. They even slept in the bed with us!

My humans tried to indoctrinate the visiting Schnauzers into our twice daily walk routine. The first walk with two humans and four Schnauzers was sort of a disaster, but by the second walk it was better. The humans assigned the girl Schnauzers to the female human and the boy Schnauzers went to the male human. On the walks, the humans soon discovered they were no longer just dealing with a smallish poop bag of the droppings of two miniature schnauzers, but the droppings of FOUR Schnauzers including one Standard with larger poop offerings to scoop!

My adopted brother Mike, who the humans were concerned would not take well to the visitors, had a great time and played lots of outside (and inside!) ball with the visiting Schnauzers. As you can see in one of the photos above, Chopper and Mike really bonded and soon were nap-cuddling together on the sofa (it was nauseatingly cute and I had to put up with listening to my humans cooing over the sweetness)! Frieda, the Standard Schnauzer, made herself at home in the recliner.

Now that the visiting Schnauzers are back with their own humans, life is starting to get back to normal. It might take a small period of recovery, but soon I will have my humans under my paw again!